Sunday, December 7, 2008
Sunflowers. I am horrified by sunflowers. And by "horrified", I mean that I damn near shit my pants in the presence of a full-blown sunflower. Hell, my sphincter seizes up within fifty yards of the things. They're creepy to me on a number of levels.First, the flowers are as big as my head. Bigger, even. I'm freaked out by any fruit or flower that size. Also, something about that inner dark part of them is just awful. It wants to be fuzzy and inviting but ... it's not. Maybe it's like Velcro that would grab my hair, leaving me trapped. And then! If you look at the seeds in one, the number and closeness of them is unnerving. All those little pods in a pattern. Ugh! They turn my guts to jelly. I searched the internet a few times to see if anyone shared my discomfort with sunflowers and came up empty. Interestingly, though, there seem to be others with a "tube" or "opening" hangup, and as I read their explanations of why, precisely, they were freaked out, I realized that it kind of matched up with the sunflower-seed part of my phobia. It's the pattern. I'm tempted to mention my issues with both cotton swabs and wooden spoons but ... nah. It's more a texture thing than a phobia. And, besides, I'd seem like a fruitcake. Since, you know, a blatant fear of sunflowers is completely unremarkable. Heh.