Monday, December 8, 2008

Nadya

1.) I am terrified about driving or walking across bridges, particularly cable bridges. They make no sense to me. I am convinced that eventually, the bridge will collapse under the weight of so many heavy vehicles, and I'm going to be crushed and mangled and cut by concrete / cables / other vehicles, then plummet into a watery grave where, undoubtedly, even more cars and concrete will land on top of me.

2.) Every time I sit down on the toilet, I'm pretty sure that a large sewer rat will have somehow made its way through the pipes. This rat will emerge in my toilet bowl and attempt to climb out of it as I'm seated upon it.

3.) Whenever I'm walking down any set of stairs--but especially down to the subway--I'm convinced someone is going to push me. I will fall. I will tumble. I will break my neck and back and bust all of my teeth. This is why I always, always hold onto the railing.

4.) The times I actually get to drive (I don't own a car), and I find myself at a standstill while directly beneath an overpass, I panic. I am quite certain that this overpass will collapse and kill me.

5.) Pictures of whale's tails. It all began when I was a tot, and my brother showed me a giant two-page colour photograph of two kayakers being dwarfed by a whale's tail sticking out of the water. The thing was too...damn...big. The shape of it was intimidating and scary. Worse was, if this tail alone could make two kayakers look like grains of sand, how the hell big was the REST of the whale under the water?

6.) Living in a ground-floor flat. There is every probability that some guy is going to break open a window, come into my apartment, and kill me in a violent way.

2 comments:

Ryland said...

"The thing was too...damn...big. The shape of it was intimidating and scary. Worse was, if this tail alone could make two kayakers look like grains of sand, how the hell big was the REST of the whale under the water?"

That wasn't the tail.

Vuraaa said...

the toilet thing....oh. my. god. me too. it's horrible. and really gross to think about. but i can't not think about it.